Well... (No Pictures Today Sorry don't feel like it)
Sometimes the words just slip away from you. Mine did, and have been since I got home. To come home with such tragic news, kinda gives you a WHOLE new view point on life, makes you think what is important and what isn't, what monsters truly are, and what angel truly are. To sit down and hide your feelings is a VERY hard thing to do. I'm a very emotional person, but when news like this comes, I try to hide it, until I am locked away in my room, with the music blaring so no one knows what my emotions are. I show them when I am with my friends, and I share them with my mom. I bottle them up, till that bottle is filled to the brim and naturally falls over. The news I am referring to is all the angels that went up to heaven today. All the beautiful children that died for no reason at all, except for being in the same room as a monster. They didn't know he was a monster, they didn't know that they were going to die. 20 children died today in the hands of a man, who the police don't know if he shot himself or not. 6 adults died today, one being the principle and one being the vice principle. 20 kids, mainly kindergarden kids, became beautiful winged angels today. The news hurts deep down. Can you imagine this news being told to the 20 mothers and fathers, that their baby girl or boy died? Can you imagine if that child was the ONLY child to one of those mothers and fathers? Can you imagine how their holiday's are going to be? Brings a tear to my eye just typing it. Why would this man do this? Why HARM a child, an innocent angel, a innocent soul? It hurts, and personally I am speechless.
Today was good before the news came, I brought up my grades. I got to finish drawling and coloring BIG smoosh for mom, and I got to spend more time with Davy which is always nice. He claims I seem zoned out. No, I'm just focused, next month I sign my job contract and thats when my life begins. I'm focused on my grades, I'm focused on my family and what little time I have with them. I am focused on the thought that I wont get to see Davy all the much over Christmas break. I'm focused on the things I need to do to make sure that the next 7 months are joyce with my family because that's all I have left. I am just focused and now with the news of the shooting in a Connecticut Elementary School, brings me to reality. Makes me more fearful, and makes me want to be closer to my family. I wish others could see what I see, but that is nearly impossible. I ignore the bad, I ignore the evil and focus on the good and the pure, but the evil always finds away through. Always.
I found out that Davy is not going to be going back to normal school until possible after the holidays and that really sucks, I was looking forward to seeing him everyday again, to hold his hand again, to see his smile that brightens my day up when I am stuck in a class with my ex or an annoying freshman. It just sucks. Well as I said before and I will probably say about a million times in my life, You can't always get what you want. At least not the first time, so you try try and umm try again. I found out also that I'm a drama magnet, that is going to stop. I pray. I don't like the feeling of EVERYONE coming to me wanting to know things, especially things I have nothing to do with. I hate the feeling that everyone relies on me for the answers, especially when I don't have them. I am proud to help and be there to defend you, but not about EVERYTHING. *sigh*
Well I am going to get off of here, maybe pop open a book for once and read some. I need to gain more knowledge anyway.
May all the little angels that died today, sleep in peace.
Until Next Time
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Proud U.S. Airman Gordon
Leave Date July 20th, 2013
Proud Sister of 2 Little Brothers
Proud Daughter of a Wonderful Mother
Proud Girlfriend of David D.
~US AIR FORCE~
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